Expectations

I internalize expectations deeply.

This causes pressure.

I feel the weight of them.

I carry them with me constantly.

I, in turn, place very high expectations on myself.

Looking back, I've worked to meet others' expectations my whole life.

Yes, as a result, I am a hard worker.

But also: it is not always positive to carry this weight and pressure constantly.

And: at some point, others' expectations stop serving me--or, they're not my business--or, they're not clear--or, they don't align with what I want.

Sometimes, I'm grateful for the push--external and internal.

Meeting and beating expectations is why I'm where I am today.

But: it is my career (and life). It is my journey.

The greatest rewards have come from moments I've reflected on what I really want and gone for that.

Sure, that sometimes aligns with what others think I'll do.

But it also means: I did what I wanted, for me, by me.

It has taken me a long time to get there--to where I am (sometimes) able to do what I want to do.

And: I still, daily, struggle with doing what others want and need and expect.

That's okay (and, honestly, my career choice requires that).

But both can be true. I can do the job I've signed up for and pursue it in a way that makes sense for me.

You can too.

🔥❤️✌️