Vivid Dreams

I have vivid dreams.

I have had them from a very young age.

Last night, it was a doozy.

I dreamt that partners gave out grades to associates.

And that I had a firm GPA to worry about.

A partner I like (in real life) gave me a less than stellar (in my dreaming opinion) grade for a client that is important to me (also in real life).

This “B” was going to sink my GPA.

In my dream, I was very, very upset.

I processed the angst abruptly and energetically in my dream—including talking to colleagues (from real life) about how to fix and get out of the situation.

It was so intense and real that I woke up still processing the feelings: disappointment, tight chest, confusion, sadness, anger.

It took me a minute to remember: we don’t get grades at my firm (and I don’t have a firm GPA to worry about) and that I’m doing good work for this partner and this client (in real life).

Why am I sharing this here?

Because I know some of you are anxious achievers like me.

Many elder millennials (and those just older and younger than us) have been on the achievement and meets-expectations hamster wheel for several decades.

The habits and thought patterns we form around this endless pursuit are hard to break.

I struggle with this often and deeply.

I even process this in my dreams.

I am not sure I’ll ever completely break free from the fears, doubts, and need to achieve.

But I know this: I have a tool box full of techniques to bring me back to the present moment when these habits and thought patterns take over.

♣️ Meditation

♣️ Journaling

♣️ Breathing Exercises

♣️ Talking to Others

♣️ Mental Health Days

♣️ Quick Breaks

♣️ A Closing Ritual

♣️ Giving Myself Permission to Do Less

♣️ Saying No

I’ll try to use these today, when the doubts and anxieties creep in.

I’ll remember these when an anxiety-inducing dream tricks me into thinking I’m not good enough.

#lawyerwellbeing #personaldevelopment #professionalwomen